Bein Adam LeChavero Opportunities in Shul – Part 3

Here are the last 27 Bein Adam LeChavero opportunities in Shul from David Bar-Cohn.

48. Not pushing anyone out of the way in order to touch or kiss the sefer Torah.

49. Handing a siddur to the person who just did hagbah and is occupied with holding the sefer Torah.

50. Asking women whether they have any names for the misheberach for cholim (ill).

51. Standing for the misheberach for the Medina and Tzahal if that’s the shul’s minhag (custom).

52. Not getting angry at people who don’t stand for whatever reason.

53. Giving your attention to someone who gives a drasha (sermon) – i.e. not talking, reading a book, falling asleep or walking out, so as not to make them feel
uncomfortable.

54. Not being matriach people by giving a long drasha.

55. Being sensitive to the audience, giving a drasha they can understand and relate to, being careful not to offend or alienate people, or give overly heavy mussar
(reproach) if it’s not your place.

56. Not being matriach people with long post-davening announcements.

57. Not getting upset when people speak too long.

58. Picking up trash, candy wrappers, etc.

59. Helping put siddurim and chumashim away.

60. If you used a shul tallis, put it back neatly.

61. Buying a few siddurim or chumashim for the shul if you see they’re needed.

62. Thanking the ba’al koreh, gabbaim, ba’alei tefillah and shul rabbi for their efforts.

63. Offering to chip in for or sponsor kiddush or third meal on occasion.

64. At kiddush, looking to let others take first, not wanting to contribute to a “feeding frenzy.”

65. Offering to get a plate of food and drink for an older person.

66. Making sure that your children aren’t running amok, taking too much food, or making a mess.

67. Not standing right by the kiddush table and making people have to walk around you to get to the food.

68. Extending yourself to people who are standing or sitting alone, or who you know are going through difficult times.

69. Expressing warmth and congratulations to ba’alei simcha and their family members.

70. Thanking the kiddush sponsors and people who do setup and cleanup.

71. Helping to set up and clean up, or at the very least cleaning up after yourself and your family.

72. In general, looking for ways to contribute, not just spectate.

73. Inviting people for a meal on Shabbat/Yom Tov if you suspect they may not have a place to go.

74. Not asking a person where they davened today, so as not to embarrass someone who didn’t go to shul.

1 thought on “Bein Adam LeChavero Opportunities in Shul – Part 3”

  1. It saddens me that some of these even have to be said. But I’ve witnessed similar behavior – especially the talking – in my own shul.

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